It took me some time to realize that I was fully and completely loved. I remember thinking he loved me, or maybe he did, but it wasn't until I was able to be totally honest with someone, tell him everything, even the secret things, that I knew that I was loved. Unconditionally.
Many years later, I would again struggle with being loved. but, this time I was struggling with knowing without a bit of doubt that my Savior loved me. I mean, I read about His unfailing love and I knew and believe that His Word was true, but I wasn't sure it was true for me.
My sister encouraged me to look at myself in the mirror every day and say aloud, "God loves me. I am His beloved." And I tried and I wanted to believe it, to believe her, to believe Him, but it was hard.
Especially on the days that I felt so unlovable The screaming at the children, the unkempt house, the mean comment to my husband. How could anyone love me?
My sister than asked me to do something else. To imagine God, and imagine myself climbing into His lap and letting Him put my arms around me. so, I closed my eyes and I could see Him and feel His arms around me.
For me, when I imagined an image of God in my mind, it was my grandfather in his favorite chair and he was smiling, allowing me to climb onto his lap and rest in his embrace.
I knew once again that I am indeed loved.
I am on of His beloved. And it is comforting.